Do you have the confidence to become the kind of person you want to become? Step one is to believe in yourself. Step two is to begin today to act like the person you want to become. Anyone can become the person they want to become by just acting like it.
I started thinking of myself as a professional speaker and a writer. I just started pretending to be the person I wanted to be. As soon as I made that mindset change I almost immediately started getting opportunities to speak and to write. I knew I wasn’t that person when I started. It is amazing how much more confidence I created by just acting like that person. No one knew I was acting at the time, but they believed I was that person. Now I believe it.
When I was a kid I did this almost everyday. I’m sure you did too. I was a police officer, an astronaut, a celebrity, etc. and my childhood friends did too. Some of my friends were good at it, and some weren’t. Now as an adult I see other adults acting like the person they want to be. They may seem a little awkward at first but eventually what happens? They eventually become that person.
In recent years you have already done this too. Who were you when you interviewed for that last job? You most likely acted like the person you thought the interviewer was looking for. There is no difference here, except don’t act like someone that someone else wants you to be, act like the person you want to be.
M. Scott Peck, M.D. said:
“Once a mind is truly stretched, it never returns to its former dimensions.” – M. Scott Peck, M.D.
This is true for you once you start acting like the person you want to become. Once your mind believes it, one day you will wake up and be that person.
Becoming a better person, a better spouse, a better friend, a better employee, or a better leader takes time. Pretending to be that person (while you may stumble at first) is the fasted way to becoming that person. Don’t tell me that you can’t do it or that no one will believe you. Who cares, become that person today.
Who do you want to be? When have you acted like someone else to eventually become the person you want to be?
Very Very good message and a very good post. You really hit the nail on the head. The beginning starts in the mind. Thank you very much. Peace be with you .
I like your phrase “The beginning starts in the mind”. I am glad you like this post.
I think this is especially true with writing, we all start as pretenders, and need to keep acting until we’ve decided that’s what we do–write.
Yes. I completely agree with you. Writing is one of the first places to pretent. For me it is one of the easiest places to pretent because I can contiue to review and edit until I think I have pretended successfully. You are becoming a regular commenter here. Thank you.
Nice post! I’m a big fan of “acting as if” or, as I prefer, fake it ’til you make it! Before you know it, you really feel that natural confidence.
“Fake it ’til you make it” would have been a great add to this post. I wish I thought of it earlier but appreciate having it in your comment. You have a great website name.
Very good counsel Chris. Our attitude is a very powerful tool, if channeled toward worthwhile goals! Cheers!
Thanks Ray. Thanks for all your help and support.
Wow, this is so uncanny. I started a short story where the main character does just this. Pretends to be someone more confident until it becomes the truth. Thanks for posting this. It was really encouraging. ^^
Wow. That is very cool. I would love to read your short story. Please let me know when it is available. There is a purpose to timing sometimes. Thanks for your post.
No problem. ^^ Hopefully it will do well in the competition I’m entering it into. I can let you read it once the competition is over.
I don’t mean this as naysaying, it’s just a question based on something overheard.
There used to be a saying “Keep it real.” Related to it is, “Write what you know.”
Now we have “fake it ’til you make it” which I think is closer to “Throw some sh– against the wall and see if it sticks.”
I think you aren’t talking about either, it’s more like the “Be, don’t seem to be” motto we had in college; I’d like to know if you think there is a difference between a person who is learning a role while playing it and a person who is lying to himself (herself) to a fault, and if it is easy to tell the two apart.
I really appreciate your comment and your challenge to “keep it real”. My suggestion is that if you want to become something more, too many people avoid making the jump to become something better. You describe it well when you say “learning the role while playing it”. Most people can tell if you are lying to yourself. The first step is believing in yourself, then it is acting like the person you want to become. If you don’t believe in yourself you will really struggle to come across with the credibility to become the person you want to become.
Part of me also says, even if you are lying to yourself, faking it, and throwing something on the wall to see if it sticks, why not go for it? Does it really matter at the end of the day if you are experimenting with becoming someone else?
Thank you for your thought provoking comment. I think it helps the conversation with comments like this.
This response makes a lot of sense, thank you.
I suppose if you accept that you are capable of becoming what you profess, you can’t possibly be lying to yourself unless you are repeatedly attempting the blood-from-stone and men-bearing-children sort of impossible, and I expect most people to be able to see through that.
I think experimenting with the idea of becoming something else matters if you enter a situation where you don’t like the outcome, particularly if you can’t change back… That’s the next post, isn’t it?
I agree that most people will be able to see through if you are lying to yourself but then again, I don’t know that I care what other people think. I say go for it.
[...] Make the decision to not be intimidated. You may need to just start out acting like you are not intimidated. Eventually you will believe in yourself enough to avoid being intimidated by anyone. More about acting like your success can be found here. [...]
[...] Act like your success: The fast-track to becoming the person you want to be [...]
[...] it happen. This may be one of your greatest opportunities to act like your success. The new people you meet will only know the person you are trying to [...]